Seasons of Learning Part 1

So I mentioned in last week's post that since I buried this blog in 2012, I have taken up the mantle of homeschooling the boys. In 2015, Eli was in 3rd grade, and came home from school in tears more times that I care to count because of the high-pressure testing culture that was becoming the norm in Georgia...3rd grade, y'all. He would get his little nine-year-old self so wound up over "benchmarks" and "milestones" that the only way he could decompress was to melt into a puddle of tears when I picked him up in the afternoons. It was heartbreaking. This sweet, wiggly little boy, who already struggled in math but worked so hard at everything his teachers asked him to do...his spirit was being crushed, and I saw the spark of a love of learning diminish each time he "failed" one of those stupid tests.

And as a teacher? Well, there were rumblings of my pay being tied to my students' performance on high-stakes tests. Which I can appreciate being measured and compensated based on my performance as a teacher, but the tests wouldn't necessarily count for or against the students in any way, shape, or form. So basically my livelihood might depend on whether or not a student chose to take the test seriously or "Christmas tree" the whole thing. Let's face it, teenagers aren't dumb.  They would have figured out if the test didn't count for them, and most of them wouldn't put any effort into something that they knew wasn't real. Now, I don't know if Georgia ever went that route or not, so I'm not saying this is what actually happened. All I know is that the question of how the tests would count for students was floating around in 2015 when I closed my classroom door for the last time.

Now, I'm not against public education at all; society as a whole benefits from an educated public. Kids can still receive a good education in public school if their parents are involved in their academic lives...from my experience, this is normally the number one indicator of academic success.  And many homeschooling families (my family included) are just one lost job away from needing to put the public school system to use. But I am so thankful for the season God has put us in.  Jason and I had been contemplating homeschooling for a year or so.  And I thought we had settled on me teaching one more year (2015-16), so we could pay off some debt. But God...Isn't that just the way He is?  But God...He had other plans.

While out to dinner for our 11th anniversary, Jason told me that I should go ahead and tell my principal that I would not be coming back for the next school year. So all within a month's time, I had broken my contract with the school system, withdrawn the boys from school, spent a small fortune on Amazon for all the books and curriculum I thought I'd need, and raided the library for as many library books on Ancient civilizations as I could possibly find.  We were going to go the classical education route (more on that in another post later), and we were starting from the very beginning (of recorded history).

Among many other things, we studied ancient Egypt, Greece, and Rome, math, and classifications of living things. We played with magnets and compasses, did nature walks and artist studies, memorized poetry, learned cursive, joined a co-op for P.E. classes, and read books on top of books from children's versions of the Iliad and Odyssey to Little House to A Christmas Carol. My goal for the first year of our homeschooling adventure was to help the boys love school again (which I find sad to say since they were only in 2nd and 4th grades). Look how little they were!

Who doesn't love reading in a box?

The haul from the library.

Inspired by Van Gogh's "Sunflowers"

Doing a unit on birds. Drawing what they saw and finding out names, habitats, and sounds.

We were also able to pack school up and take it to North Carolina in early September. We stayed at my parents' house for a few days while Jason interviewed for a job in Oak Ridge, Tn. and did school in their RV (that was a lot of fun!). The week we were there, my Mammaw passed away, and we got to be there to hold her hand and say our goodbyes. I have the sweetest video of Eli reading Little House in the Big Woods to her; his sweet little voice reading those words to the woman who had actually lived that kind of life...churned her own butter, scalded her own hog, given her own children oranges and peppermint candy for Christmas. That week I realized for the first time why God had brought us to homeschooling in the first place.  Sure, I can give my boys a wonderful, living education and the personal attention they need, but more importantly was the time we were granted.  Time to be present for all of the important moments we would otherwise have missed.  That lesson would be driven home time and time again over the next three and a half years.

Excavating the Relic

This is what we look like now.  Taller (them), older (me).  My how things have changed.

It has been nearly 7 years since this blog has seen the light of day. Why? I couldn't quite tell you. In that time, the boys have gone from 7 and almost 5 to 14 and almost 12. Teenager. I have a teenager in my home now, y'all. And one more following fast on his heels. In 2015, I quit teaching at Perry (let's say I decided that public education and I have irreconcilable differences) and have started homeschooling these goobers. We're starting our fifth year of this messy, miraculous madness of homeschooling. I've learned as much as the boys have...what people call "redeeming" my education. And I'm redeeming my time with the boys. I love the time I've gotten with them as a result of this surrendering to God's design for our family at this time in our lives.

We moved. Since 2016, we're no longer suffering below the gnat line in Middle Georgia. Now we live in Oak Ridge, Tennessee right outside of Knoxville. We moved for Jason's career and never looked back. Jason is killing it at work, and the boys and I have found our tribe in a Classical Conversations community.

We became foster parents to a sweet little girl named Abby. She spent a gloriously messy 9 months with us, and we loved her big. She was reunited with her mom in September 2018, and though we knew that was the desired outcome, we were devastated when she left us. But God has a way of restoring all things. He put that family back together, and He continues to put our hearts back together each day, too.

This move also got us closer to my parents in North Carolina...which looking back on the last three years has been the whole purpose of God in all of the changes in our lives since I buried this blog in 2012. In 2017, my sweet mother was diagnosed with Stage IV lung cancer. For two years, the boys and I were able pick up and go at a moment's notice to be with Momma. We experienced the totality of a solar eclipse with her, we went to the beach twice with her, we celebrated each time she finished a round of chemo. And on April 28, 2019, we held her hand as Jesus called her home. All thanks to homeschool and a closer address.  The thread of God's faithfulness is fully apparent in our lives.

So where do I go from here? We shall see. Maybe I'll pick back up on my 1,000 gifts counting.  Maybe I'll share a bit of what I've learned during my time homeschooling. Maybe I'll share favorite recipes and writer's workshop prompts.  More than likely it will be simply my musings on this vapor they call life.  This lovely flower quickly fading, but filled with such beauty because of its brevity.

I'm so glad I'm a part of the family of God...

Three gifts family...This would be so easy to write (yet again) about my husband and two kids.  They are the most important people in my life and they make me so happy...and simultaneously crazy.  I wouldn't trade the life I have now for anything in the world.  But I'm going to try to write differently today...

Three gifts family...

Did anyone else sing that song in church "The Family of God."  I remember at Hebron, John Williams would sometimes close the service with that song.  "Join hands across the aisle."  Anyone else remember that?  "I'm so glad I'm a part of the family of God.  I've been washed in the fountain, cleansed by His blood.  Joint heirs with Jesus as we travel this sod, for I'm part of the family, the family of God."  As a young person, even though I was a Christ follower, that song didn't make much sense to me.  Honestly, I always thought it said "Join hands with Jesus..."  I didn't understand that "joint heirs" meant that we had been adopted as children of the King.  I didn't understand that we had been grafted in...a wild olive branch.  Let me just say that again...I am a daughter of the King!!!  He chose me!  And did you know that, according to Jewish tradition, adopted children can never be disowned...a person can disown their biological children, but a child who has been adopted can never have that taken from them.  So the King who chose me to be His child, will NEVER turn his back on me.  I marvel today (and many days) that I have been grafted into the "family of God."  That He would choose such a one as I.

So my three gifts "family" today are going to center around the amazing knowledge that God chooses to adopt us into His family.  That through the bloood of Jesus, I am made clean and called a child of God.

61.  Thankful for a godly heritage.  That I was taught about God's grace, mercy, and love from a very young age.

62.  Thankful for the "family of God" at the three different churches that have shaped me as a Christ follower: Hebron, Hollywood, Second Baptist.  So thankful that the Word of God was and still is preached unashamedly and that these men and women are reaching their world in the name of Jesus.

63.  So thankful that my earthly family will be with me in Heaven one day.  We're still praying and teaching Sawyer (he's still very young), but the day that Elijah got saved was as good as the day I got saved.  This momma's heart is so happy that my children are walking in faith.

Joy Dare-3 Gifts Full (#57-59)

A Full Life

Bursting at the seams-full of noise and movement and Lego's and kisses and sword fights and Sunday School art and laundry and Bible verses and prayers and...

Oh Love that will not let me go,
I rest my weary soul in Thee.
I give Thee back the life I owe,
That in Thy oceans depths its flow
May richer fuller be.


...at times weariness.

But in spite of my daily struggle to keep up with all that I have to do as a wife, mother, teacher, God manages to show me His abundance.

57.  A pool full of water to splash and play on a lovely June evening.

58.  An iPhone full of songs that fills my home with worship and "dance parties."

59.  A lap full of praying boys.

...and a bonus...

60.  A flower bed full of these beauties...that remind me of my mother...

"Old Maids"

Joy Dare-Gifts at 8, 12, and 2 (# 54-56)

54.  8:00-A new dress to wear to church this morning.


55.  12:00-My first Compassion sponsorship

56.  2:00-Being able to fill a grocery cart with a week's worth of food without having to worry about not being able to pay for my other bills.

I am SO BLESSED!

Emptiness

I have neglected Ann Voskamp's blog "A Holy Experience" for far too long!  I followed it faithfully for a while, and for whatever reason, I stopped checking in.  Well, I checked in today and she is counting three gifts a day all year until it hits 1000!  So I'm going to start today in counting at least three things I'm thankful for each day...I'll call this #51-53.


Thankful for emptiness.  That seems to be an impossibility.  Emptiness is always equated with loneliness...uselessness.  An empty tank in a car takes you nowhere.  An empty stomach causes a gnawing ache inside.  But what about an empty life?  Is it painful?  Is it lonely?  Is it useless?  This world would tell us "yes."  Why else do we try so hard to fill our days with movement, noise, activity, acquaintances, busy-ness?  Even Christ-followers are guilty of filling our time according to this world's standards.  We satisfy ourselves on the things of this world, and because we are so full of the world, there is no room left for Him.  The Bride has even become guilty of filling our lives with "church" instead of worship.  We have become Martha...too busy to join Mary at the feet of Jesus.

So why should we be thankful for emptiness?  Because unless we are emptied of ourselves, of the world, we have no room for Jesus to fill us.  John the Baptist said, "He must increase, but I must decrease."  I must be emptied of myself every single day.  Because when I am full of myself and the world, that is when I become useless in the hands of the Potter.  My emptiness...our emptiness of ourselves allows God to fill us to overflowing with his mighty, victorious power.  So yes, emptiness is something to be thankful for.  Emptiness allows God to use this weak and broken vessel for His glory.

51.  An empty gas tank...because it means that I got to make a trip with my boys to visit Grandmomma and Grandaddy.  I'm so thankful for my parents and their love for their grand babies.  I hope my boys grow up with sweet memories of their time with their grandparents.

52.  An empty composition book in which to scrawl and doodle and muse.

53.  An empty classroom...because I desperately needed this summer break!

Father...that You may increase and I may decrease.  Empty me of the troubles of the world and fill me with Your love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. 

(ground) Beef...It's what's for dinner!!

Cheeseburger Macaroni...it's super easy, and I promise you'll never want Hamburger Helper again!  This was a Pinterest find from my sister, and it is SOOOOO good!  There are quite a few lovely recipes on this website.

Oh...look what I bought today!!

I've got a whole box...other than just eating them out of hand (which I will do lots of) I've got to turn them into something yummy!  This makes me very happy :)